here\'s lookin\' at you, lesbian!

It is my goal in this post to be offensive, to be humorous, and to adhere to outdated stereotypes.

1. You like the Indigo Girls
2. You like Ani DiFranco
3. You watch the L Word
4. You like Tegan & Sara
5. You enjoy Melissa Etheridge
6. Every time you watch a movie, you search for lesbian references or hints of lesbianism.
7. You think Ellen DeGeneres is amazing
8. You know what people mean when they say “See you in August!”
9. You know what the upside-down triangle stands for.
10. You like hummus
11. You have a cat, or two, or 3,000
12. You know what the Dinah Shore Weekend is all about.
13. You know these movies: “Better than Chocolate,” “D.e.b.s,” and “But I’m a Cheerleader”
14. You like comfortable shoes
15. You have been on a softball team, or are on one
16. You like the WNBA
17. You enjoy hockey, football, or rugby
18. You have a fascination with cars and know how they work
19. You have ever had to say something like, “yeah..i’m going out next weekend with my…uh…boyfriend.”
20. Your current girlfriend has dated your one of your ex-girlfriends or your friend’s girlfriend and you have also dated your friend’s girlfriend.
21. You enjoy wearing plaid
22. You like to shop in the mens’ section
23. You know what people mean when they reference “toasters” with regard to lesbians
24. You know why Palm Springs is special
25. You go to sports games to watch the cheerleaders, and when they kick up their legs, you blush madly.
26. You have been secretly in love with your best female friend before.
27. You are vegan or a vegetarian.
28. You’re really into organic foods and co-ops.
29. You live in a co-op.
30. You’ve ever listened to your favorite love song and substituted “her” for “him.”
31. You instinctively scan every girl you’re interested in for rainbows, rainbow paraphernalia, or the all too common bisexual inner wrist tattoo.
32. You have many tattoos and piercings.
33. You are connected by 2 degrees of separation to every other lesbian on the planet.
34. You own a black, studded belt. And you wear it with EVERYTHING.
35. You own a lot of t-shirts and tank tops.
36. You own tons of band t-shirts.
37. You care deeply about mother earth
38. You’ve had a HUGE crush on at least one of your female teachers.
39. If you’ve ever painstakingly gathered information in an attempt to find out if any of the L word characters are actually gay.
40. If your alcoholic drink of choice is beer.
41. If you think t shirts that say “i’m not gay but my girlfriend is” are funny
42. If you’ve ever done country line dancing
43. If you enjoy references to beavers
44. If you wear boxers to sleep
45. If you feel a strange but powerful pull towards basketball shorts
46. You plan on going on a cruise with the Oliva Cruise line someday.
47. You are SO glad Angelina Jolie is bisexual.