I have the toothbrush head. What does this mean? Well, if you’ve seen any Sex and the City episodes, you might know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the scene in the series where Carrie scores one of the attachable heads on Big’s electronic toothbrush at his place. She gets the pink tip, and he keeps the blue one. When you receive the toothbrush head, it’s a sign of moving forward. You have a large enough place in someone’s heart and life that you are worthy of keeping one of his or her toothbrushes at his or her place. There can only be two toothbrush heads. One pink and one blue one, or a pink and a pink or a blue and a blue one depending on your preference.

When she told me I could keep one of the toothbrush attachments at her place for use in her home, I was thrilled. Of course I kept my feelings of delight inside. “Thanks,” I said, feigning nonchalance. My heart was dancing in dizzying circles in my chest.

We’ve been spending a great amount of time together lately. Since I last posted, I’ve met her friends at a backyard pool party, and have stayed at her place countless times. It feels like we are together. At this point, we probably are, but we haven’t talked about it quite yet. Nonetheless, it feels amazing.

It feels amazing to walk down the street with her hand in mine, and it feels amazing to feel her arms around me when we stand on the escalator in the BART station. It feels amazing to have several of her clothing items at my place still, and it feels amazing that I left my earrings, BART ticket and some DVDs at her place. It’s like part of me is hers, and part of her is mine.

“If I left anything at your place, just let me know,” I say.

“Yeah, because you’ll <i>never</i> see them again,” she jokes.

I love waking up with her arms around me, and I love feeling her kisses on my neck and shoulders. I love the way she sighs and giggles into the side of my neck as she holds me in bed. I want to be with her all the time, and I’ve never felt this way before. She is a constant song that I can’t get out of my mind.

Her laughter is like music on a sunny day in the park. Her goodnight texts are the perfect way to end a long day. I don’t care if I get hurt. I can tell that she’s worth it.