Post from the past: Life is Short…Don’t Waste Your Time.

I stood outside of the Forever 21 in Union Square, waiting for the girl to arrive, since it was the only place she knew in San Francisco. Tourist trap, I thought. Why was I even there? Why would I even want to meet up with a girl who suggested meeting up at a place like Forever 21? We were supposed to meet up as friends, and I was supposed to show her around San Francisco. Everything within me revolted against taking this girl around the city. I didn’t want to meet her. The thought of spending a mere afternoon with her made me want to shoot myself in the foot. She had expressed an interest me and had been calling me for months, so I finally resigned myself to my tour-guide fate. The sun beat down on my face as I squinted to see if she was surfacing from the Powell BART station. I didn’t want her to surface.

My heart started beating wildly. I can escape, I thought. I could make a run for it right now, and I would never have to see her again. My heart started pounding in my chest. I performed a frenzied scan of the BART station in front of me, and then BAM! I booked it. I booked it as fast as I could towards the most nondescript part of San Francisco, the Financial District. I figured the Financial District would be the last place she would want to be, so I raced towards the oasis of un-cool. I rushed towards the Montgomery station as though a very large fireball of doom was racing towards me, and scurried down the stairs like my legs were on fire.

I had one girl on my mind, and it definitely wasn’t her.

 

Beautiful love

Thinking about her makes me weak. Wrapped up in her arms is exactly where I belong. When I think about her, sometimes I feel so much love that I could cry. How did I get to be the luckiest girl in the world? Anywhere could feel like home, as long as I had her arms around me. I feel like I just discovered one of life’s biggest secrets. I’m so lucky. The world around me is colored with her love.

Memories I love: Sharing alpaca steak in Peru, noticing how beautiful she looked standing at the train station, running to her house covered in sweat last summer, waking up at 2PM, leaving her a note and wandering around her neighborhood, coming home to her smiles every day, cuddling close in the Fremont, not ever finishing the romantic comedy we started, pulling her down on the floor with me, sitting in her lap while drinking wine, pulling her closer in to me at The Cafe in San Francisco, taking road trips with her down south, stopping at Starbucks, grabbing In N Out, waking up early to go to Peru, seeing her go to bed early in my bed, smiling seeing how peaceful she looked, being surprised by her taking me to see The Phantom of the Opera, dancing with her in the Castro, noticing how sexy (and adorable) she looked swaying next to me, not seeing anyone else in the club but her, kissing her all night, having tea with her at Samovar, getting a text from her even though she was right next to me, cuddling closer to her in the middle of the night, walking up Bernal hill together, kissing her, working from home together on Fridays, seeing her smile, lean over, and kiss me, going to Love Sushi with her, wine drenched sunset nights in Carmel, fuzzy romantic memories, noticing how breathtaking she looked at dinner at the Foreign Cinema…

 

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Love in the city

We had the most amazing weekend…going on a sunset cruise under the Golden Gate and around Sausalito, trying dim sum in Chinatown, watching a great movie at the AMC Loews theater downtown, biking through the city and across the Golden Gate, and sharing Irish coffee at the Buena Vista. It’s crazy how much I love her…sometimes I wonder if maybe we were just meant to be. Kissing her wearing our bike helmets while standing on the Golden Gate made me feel so unbelievably happy – I felt like I was falling in  love with her all over again.

 

A year later

…and I still get butterflies when she wraps her arms around me and pulls me in closer early in the morning. Happiness is waking up with her still holding me close, and feeling her breathing gently on my neck as she sleeps. How did I get so lucky?

 

I want you between me and the feeling I get when I miss you

Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated.
Alphonse de Lamartine

The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected.
Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.
Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie

If I could grab a star in the sky every time I thought of you, the whole night sky would be in my palm.

Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart. Kay Knudsen

Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it’s one day further from the last time you saw each other, it’s one day closer to the next time you will.

I want you between me and the feeling I get when I miss you,
but everything here’s telling me I should be fine,
so why is it so, it bothers below that I’m missing you every time?

I got used to you whispering things to me into the evening,
We followed the sun, and it’s colors, and left this world,
it seems to me, that I’m definitely, hearing the best that I’ve heard,.

So throw me a rope, to hold me in place,
show me a clock, for counting my days, down,
Cause everything’s easier when you’re beside me,
Come back and find me,
Cause I feel alone.

Whenever you go it’s like holding my breath under water

I can’t wait until you come back home from the trip. I miss you so much.

 

A girl can dream

Sometimes, when we’re cuddled close in bed, and I can feel her arms around me, holding me tight, I imagine a ring around her finger. I feel butterflies rushing through my body like wildfire. When I consciously think to myself, “I’m lying in bed with my wife,” I feel so weak and so proud that I can hardly stand it.

 

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Signing on today…

with nothing more to say than, God, I love this girl. Waking up with her every morning makes every day the happiest of my life.

 

rainy fridays

Thinking about her makes me smile while I’m driving to work on a rainy Friday morning.